Foreign Dads, Dominican Moms and Child Support

Given the significant number of male tourists visiting the Dominican Republic each year, it’s highly likely that many children are born to Dominican women and foreign men. Personally, I have encountered over ten Dominican women who have children with American men. Some of these women maintain relationships with the fathers through occasional visits and financial support. However, the majority are left to raise their children with little to no support or communication from these men ever again.

When Fun Turns Into Fatherhood

Majority of single men come to the Dominican Republic for women, fun and sun. The last thing any single man expects is to become a father on their vacation. However, life happens and some things don’t go as planned. Sometimes it happens in the heat of passion, or perhaps the condom breaks. Regardless of how it happened, the wheels are now set in motion. Although the morning-after pill is sold in the Dominican Republic, abortion is illegal in all circumstances. Children are typically seen as “gifts from God” in the eyes of most Dominicans, so most women are likely to keep their children.

Taking Responsibility

Because the Dominican Republic is a patriarchy, it is naturally assumed that the man will step up and provide for the family. However, most foreign men come to the Dominican Republic strictly for fun and have their own lives and possibly already established families in their home countries. Because of the distance and perceived international red tape, there is a temptation to not do what is necessarily right by the child and the mother. Most men are not aware of the fact that support can be enforced from another country.

International Child Support Enforcement

Yes, according to this law firm child support orders can and will be enforced from the Dominican Republic. Every time you are admitted into another country as a guest you provide all types of identifying details along with your passport. All of this information is recorded in a database at some level. With just your full name or even just a phone number, the process can start with your country’s embassy and go on from there. Being a citizen of another country does not make you immune to fatherhood.

Margarita’s Story

Above is a video by a Dominican digital journalist by the name of Lisandro Torres al Dia. Lisandro is sitting with Margarita and her 17 year old son Bruce in their Puerto Plata home. They are talking about her husband whom she has not seen in nearly 12 years. Although the video is in Spanish, I will give you the highlights.

Nearly two decades ago, Margarita worked at a restaurant in Sosua. This is where she met her husband. Over the time they spent together, they developed a relationship. They went on trips to the beach, Santo Domingo, Dominican Carnival in La Vega, and several other places around the country. They also got married then had a son together. There was a time where she could speak to him, his niece and his sister that lives in Miami, Florida.

Over time those lines of communication have deteriorated. A ridiculous story was invented claiming that her husband was kidnapped and being fed a ration of one meal per day by his captors. Eventually, she never heard from him again. Now, all Margarita has are photographs and memories from years past. Bruce has vague memories of his dad since the age of five, and is in his second year of secondary schooling. Margarita is now working at a hotel while not receiving no support from the father. The video ends with Lisandro encouraging others to share the video with the hope that the father sees the video or is found.

Conclusion

If you want to come to another country for the purposes of tourism, please make sure you do not leave anything (or any one) behind. These things can come back to haunt you in a major way. In regards to foreign men that get local women pregnant, please make sure you do what the right thing before you find yourself getting stopped and detained at an airport or pulled over and arrested for a warrant for outstanding child support.

The dad from Margarita’s story thought that marrying his child’s mother was the right thing in the eyes of Dominican culture, but he left both her and him behind. My theory is that he already had a family in the United States she did not know about, and chose to make a choice instead of blending his families together. If the expression “Man Up” was ever needed to be uttered, this would be the time. Margarita is sad and Bruce is angry. Hopefully they will have some closure someday.